Week 197 motherhood – June 21 Indigenous Peoples Day, new pediatrician

Going to the store with one child and waiting until the heavy rain cleared temporarily before I could carry her and the groceries to the car

Week 197 motherhood with 3 year 9 month old and 18 month old.

June 20 to 26, 2024:

It’s been another trying week with the contractors working in the basement. It’s really inconvenient to have to go upstairs to use the washroom and have the workers use the sink in the laundry room sometimes. The older one doesn’t like the workers around much (me neither).
One time after she came home with DH, she washed her hands and then realized she had more soap on her hands. I told her to go to the washroom to wash the rest of it off. For once, she went to the washroom to wash her hands by herself — HOWEVER, she quickly ran back to me and started crying because apparently one of the workers had come inside right at that moment to use the washroom too. She was scared and ran back to me. Ugh. I wish we had the old contractor who knew exactly what to do and would do it in less than a week’s time. However, he was getting old and his handiwork was becoming poor quality and he also liked to do things his way than listen to the client (us).
They were actually supposed to finish work today but they are coming back on Friday to finish one more thing. Sigh. Three weeks in hindsight is not a lot and we’ll have a brand new basement to enjoy, but the process and being in it right now is just not enjoyable. Someone always has to be home to oversee them. Like this past weekend, we could have gone out but we had to stay home to oversee them (since grandma was already out).
The kids have been enjoying water play at the water station a lot. It’s actually a make-shift water table and not one fit for water play. Water keeps leaking out from the bottom of the sensory table. I’m on the lookout for an affordable water table on Facebook marketplace and I hope I find one soon!
It’s been a relief this week to have the heat wave lifted too.
At the Creative Chefs class, we made power balls and guacamole dip. Again, the child didn’t really want to do anything herself. I also think some of the parts of the prepping process were a little hard for her to do. The rolling and sticky power balls wasn’t something she was comfortable with or interested in doing. She also didn’t want to eat “her” creations after we were done either. I packed it up in her lunchbox and she ate it in the car on our way home. It was a hot day and she actually passed out when I had arrived at the Flashfood store pickup. For the first time, I quickly went into the store to get the things while she was sleeping in the car. I rolled down all the windows and parked the car next to the shopping carts so that I could get in and out quickly.
Unfortunately, when we got home, she was still sleeping, so I took the bags in first and photographed them. When I went out, she was already awake and crying. She had likely been awake for a while already and distraught because she called out and I wasn’t there. Poor baby. It was my mistake. Sigh. Luckily, she didn’t seem to suffer any lasting damage from it. I told her what happened and I apologized to her.
June 21 was a special day for us. It is easy to remember this date because it is also the National Indigenous Peoples Day. In the afternoon, I took the older one with grandma and I to the bank. It was our first visit to the bank in a while and the older one was comfortable eating her snacks on my lap in the chair. She wasn’t shy at all. I’m glad. So it seems to be just school setting/EarlyON setting where she is holding out on eating with others these days.
On the Saturday, we went to east Markham to visit my friend and her son for the first time. Both kids were a bit timid to begin with. The younger one warmed up quickly when she noticed some plush animals (Pokemon) in the living room and a push toy that she took to play with. The older one clung to DH. The younger one was excited to see the almost 5-month-old baby on the floor and she actually grabbed his feet and hands too when I said she could. So cute.
When she got hungry, the older one sat with DH and ate her snacks/lunch from her lunch box. The younger one peeled her hard-boiled egg by herself and liked the blueberries too.
On the Sunday, I had some self-care time where I got my brows done for the first time! It look way less time than I anticipated/was told. I was only there for 1.5 hours. I thought it would take 2 to 3 hours! The older one kept asking me about why my eyebrows looked that way when I got home lol.
On the Monday, we had the fourth session of the Triple P consult with the EarlyON educator. She said this week will be difficult as we have to start with fear ladders and basically facing the child’s fear by actually doing the things she is afraid of. The fear ladder is such a great concept. I am so glad we signed up for Triple P to have this tool in our arsenal for when the kids grow up. I also told her the good and bad things this week — the older one, upon attending the same location EarlyON for the second day in a row, didn’t say “I don’t want to be alone” and she would walk into the sites by herself. The bad thing was that she continues to hold out on eating with others. DH and I have to think of a fear that we want to face for our own fear ladders as well. To be honest, I don’t really have a fear that I need to work on?! I’ll have to sleep on this…
On the Tuesday, we met the kid’s new pediatrician for the first time! It wasn’t as bad as I thought and actually really pleased that we have a new medical professional to learn from. The receptionist was really kind and patient when she took the heights and weights of both girls. They actually have a measuring tool for the infants on the table — something that the previous clinic didn’t have.
The ped didn’t have a smile or warm demeanour when she entered the room but her style seems to be very quick and to the point. She looked at both kids’ immunization records and immediately knew that they have their third dose of the Twinrix coming up in October — love that she is on the ball. She asked about both kids’ birth weights and which hospital they were born at and how my pregnancy was. She also asked about if they had jaundice or needed phototherapy.
She advised us to take the kids to their first pediatric dental appointment as well as to check the older one’s eyes before she starts JK in September. When asking about if the younger one goes to daycare and I said she doesn’t, she asked if she attends EarlyON, and I said, “Yes, all the time.” I was super pleased that she brought up EarlyON and knew what it is. Our previous ped never mentioned this/never brought up their social growth aspects.
She told us that the 18 month old was a smaller baby at 35 percentile for weight and her head circumstance was at 50 percentile (bigger head compared to body). Our old ped never gave us the exact number percentile. He always told us the approximate (that she was around 50 percentile overall and doing fine). It’s very refreshing to get actual facts now instead of plain reassurance (which is good too but it kinda kept us in the dark about the details).
She asked if the 18 month old knows 10 words. We said, “No, more like 5…”. She knows ma ma, ba ba, jei jei, “ball”, and “pow bo” lol. DH says she can say “I want” in Cantonese too but I haven’t heard it yet.
The ped asked if she can point well and she said she does. She asked if she can walk well and we said yes. She asked if her toothpaste contains fluoride and we said yes.
The ped was the one who actually gave her her 18 month old shots. At the old clinic, the nurse would do it on behalf of the doctor. So different.
The ped tried to take the 3 year old’s blood pressure with the inflated arm cuff but she refused. She refused to open her mouth for the doctor to look at too. She did let her look at her eyes and inspect her ears and also listen to her chest and back. The ped said we will try at the next visit to take her blood pressure. The old ped never took her blood pressure before either! So different.
Before we left, the ped asked the older one if she wanted some stickers. She didn’t want it lol. The ped smartly gave the stickers to me — thereby giving it to her indirectly. We never got stickers from the previous ped either!
One interesting thing is that the clinic doesn’t make appointments past two months, so even though we need to see her again in October, we won’t be able to make an appointment until late August. C’est la vie.
In the afternoon, I took the older one by myself to the Family Stay and Play session so that she can have more regular EarlyON exposures. There were a lot of people and a lot of kids in her space. Once the facilitator tried to talk to her, she wanted to stop the activity and move somewhere else to play. It’s too bad she is so skittish.
There was one girl there who was playing unoccupied — her mom was just chatting away with the other parents. This girl was the same girl who took the teapot toy from my younger one last week — the mom didn’t even know. The girl was in our space and her snack was on the floor and some of it got on to the paper mat too that we were playing at. I had to tell the facilitator about it so she could tell the mom to look after her child. Ugh. These parents are so annoying and ignorant and self-centred. If she paid more attention to her daughter, then she wouldn’t have been walking around with her snack away from the snack table. The EarlyON supervisor was actually there and noticed and tried to tell the parent to remove the child from the snack area if she appears to be done eating already but it was fruitless. The parent just didn’t care enough.
It affected us because had the girl not been in our space and dirtying the space, my child would have been more focused at the task at hand which was using scissors to cut people out from a magazine and sticking it on to the floor mat. It was a new activity and one that she would have liked to do for a long time had we not been interrupted. She does need to learn to play in spite of others around her, but some parents also need to be more attentive of their child at EarlyON settings. It is not a daycare where the facilitators will watch your child. YOU are the one who are supposed to be looking at your child all the time.
During circle time dancing, the child didn’t want to participate. I carried her for a bit but then told her that she didn’t need to dance but just to stand by herself at least. It took some struggling, but she did stand for one of the songs the majority of the time. I praised her and made sure she knew it. The kids were super loud and active at this circle time too coincidentally which made her feel uncomfortable.
The supervisor noticed her behaviour and came up to me to chat for a bit. I was in the middle of reading with the child and as much as I tried to be succinct about her situation, she should have kept it short and brief and let me read with my child. I already told her we were in Triple P and we were taking baby steps to get her to be comfortable. It almost seemed like she really wanted to “help” me by giving me all the tips and guidance she could think of to help our situation. But no, I already have sought out help and we’re doing the work already. I wish some people would read the signs and stop talking when it’s been too long already.
We attended the EarlyON Indigenous Peoples celebration at Milne Park which was hosted by 3 EarlyON locations. It was a really good event where they had play stations set up throughout the park. They had a water table, painting, books, musical instruments, loose parts, etc. We arrived there late, 30 minutes after it began. There were a lot of kids and adults and I recognized basically 90% of all of the staff from across all 3 sites. I think the older one felt overwhelmed with all the activities. She held my hand and we walked from activity to activity but she never really fully stayed at one. Instead, she ended up walking with me towards the grassy fields and towards the pond. She wanted some solitude, I guess. I totally get it and I was fine with it.
When it was time for the special guest Metis jiggers to perform, we sat amongst the crowd and watched them. It was essentially the same topics as the Indigenous event last week at the smaller park. We went through the rowing and clapping and jig dancing. After a while, the younger one lost interest and wanted to walk around. So we did. We had to be careful of the goose droppings on the fields. Soon, the older one joined us too. It was another great day for the kids to be outdoors running around.
When it was time to leave, the younger one didn’t want to leave and wanted to continue walking the fields. I carried her as she cried lol. When we left, the EarlyON staff waved bye and said the older child’s name too. A lot of them recognize us.
After finding out the news, the older one kept talking about the animal and she seems to be excited and good natured about it. Time will tell what will actually happen.